Two quotes from Shakespeare seem to be applicable today...
“Listen to many, speak to a few.”
I love to read blogs, the news, Sports Illustrated, Maxim, Dwell, and a million other magazines. I like to get opinions from the LA Times, the NY Times, the local paper, the foreign press, and almost anyone I have time for. I have found, however, very few people who are worth talking to. This goes in the face of some early posts where I praise the many people I have met here and now call my friends, that is still true, so I will illustrate.
I went to lunch late today, and after passing 7 homeless people (they come out in the summer), I ran in to a street corner advocate. We get them all the time, college kids eager to change the world one registered voter at a time. She accosted me and, because of a tight blouse, cute hair, and great lips, I stopped to talk, even though she was holding a clip board covered in stickers that screamed, "I am a college liberal until I meet my Republican husband."
She wanted me to support or oppose legislation that would either cap carbon emissions or change the nature of the NFL draft, I was never sure, because she was so ill-informed that it was almost impossible to talk to her. She launched in to a prepared speech, as expected, but during her first paragraph I asked her a simple question about some of the Cap-and-Trade proposals that are being considered. Since I work in the energy business, I knew what to ask, she did not know how to answer. When she asked who I worked for, I admitted it freely and she called me, a lowly IT analyst, a liar and accused my company of sponsoring "deceitful and twisted" research. When I told her that my company, a small player on a big field, didn't sponsor publicly released research, she called me "a dupe of the masters." I just laughed and laughed, which really pissed her off. I then slipped my hand up inside her skirt, and made her cum. OK, that last part didn't happen, but I thought about trying, just to see if she would change the subject.
It was good to listen to her, pointless to talk to her.
“Teach not thy lip such scorn, for it was made For kissing, lady, not for such contempt.”
This sounds like an early version of Thumper's advice. But what struck me is how we choose to communicate. I had two dear friends go through relationship trauma this weekend. One met a new person and felt rejected, one lost a lover to a relationship change that she could not control. Both had to decide how to react, which words would fall from their beautiful lips.
One friend was sad, almost to the point of crying, she felt rejected, but held her head high, kept her life in perspective, and made it through. She chose to think, and to reason, and to ponder until it made sense, until she remembered her self-worth, and moved forward. The other practiced and rehearsed what could, should, and what might happen during her meeting with her companion. She held her scorn, her sadness, her frustration inside. She knew what was coming and was ready and kept her dignity in tact, saying that she was glad she didn't resort to "emotional blackmail" with tears and begging. She kept her lips for what they do best, for kissing.
What words do we pick in our relationships? Do we let slip anger, the snide insult, the personal dig that cuts those we love the deepest. The more we know, the more we share with each other, the more ammunition we gain for inflicting future pain.
Do we teach our lips scorn and contempt, or do we save them for kissing, for love, for positive thoughts and strengthening each other. I had two conversations today, and we lifted each other up, and that is what lips are for.
(I know this is terribly sappy today, but I wanted my friends to know that I love talking to them, and I was glad that we had time to talk.)
And, to those who dropped by hoping for something sexier, I had a wonderful sex dream last night and got a great, if quick, hand job in the shower this morning. Ya' happy now?