TMI Tuesday - MUSIC!!

1. What's the most annoying song in the world?
This is an easy one.



2. What's the saddest song in the world?
Another easy one. So I picked a sad version of the saddest song. Not oonly is the singer devestated by news, he's delusional that he wants her to be happy.




3. What's the sexiest song in the world?
An ex-girlfriend called me one day, out of the blue, and asked me out to lunch. She took me to the mountains and asked me to make her cum one more time before she got engaged. This song was on the radio.  I posted about it here.



4. Name a new, to you, band or music artist that you can't get enough of? Post a link to one of their songs.

I'm not head over heals for any particular band right now, but the last album I bought was Mumford and Sons



5. Have you met any famous musicians?

I've shaken hands with a Chuck Mangione in the 80's, I saw Prince at the airport and David Hasselhoff at a restaurant. He counts, but only in Germany.

6. What song best describes your life?



7. How important is your partner’s taste in music to you?

Not at all really. She's not in to music so I load up a few songs she wants on the iPod in her car and she's set. She doesn't like most of the music I like so I get the kids hooked on it and let them control the iPod while we drive.

8. Do you sing in the shower?

Loudly, and very well. I have to sing loud to hit the high notes.


9. What was the last live music show you attended? Did you buy a t-shirt?

Because of my answer to #7, we don't go to a lot of concerts. We like local musical theatre which is usually bad, but fun, so the last concert I was at was the one I sang in for Christmas 2009.

10. What's the sweetest song in the world?

I don't do sweet. Something from Taylor Swift probably.

11. Can you play a musical instrument? Which one?

I play piano and saxophone (kind of) but I haven't made time to practice either on a regular basis for a long time. More piano lately as my kids have started taking lessons. I also bought a banjo last year. I'm looking for a teacher.

12. Are you in a band or are you a performing solo music artist? If yes, what kind of music do you play?

I sing in my church choir and with a quartet once in a while. Mostly church stuff and the occasional rest home during the holidays.  In high school I had my own jazz/rock combo and was in everything else.

13. Have you ever dated a musician?

All through high school the band and orchestra were pretty incestuous, but since then, I've tended towards artists.  The are just as flaky

14. Are you a groupie? - No
- If yes, for what artist/band? -
- If no, do you wish you were and for what music performing artist or band?

If I could be, it would be for Pink Floyd, but, well, they broke up.

Bonus: Describe your worst, best, strangest, funniest or saddest concert moment.

Elton John, sophomore year in high school - 15 years old.  My older sister had an extra ticket so she reluctantly brought me.  I had never been to a big concert before so she told me to stay out of her way and not embarrass her friends.  While standing there, behaving myself, a beautiful girl was crying across the aisle.  She made eye contact with me and I said hi and we started yelling to each over the music.  Her boyfriend had dumped her during the concert and walked out.  I hugged her and offered her a ride home.  This was a huge leap for a kid who had never even kissed a girl, but when I told my sister about it we realized she lived 20 miles the wrong direction and my sister wouldn't have anything to do with it.  Remember, this was all pre-cell phones so we danced next to each other for the rest of the concert and I had a boner the whole time.  I never saw her again, but it was quite a memory.

One other one, I was at the B-52's many years ago and had seats in the nosebleed section.  The girl, tall, killer brunette hair, great eyes, was wearing a sport coat and a lacy bra over super tight and small shorts.  We talked, flirted, and I impressed my friends be getting a phone number.  It turned out to be fake, but still, I made the effort.

Bonus, Bonus: If you listen to the radio, what station and type of music are you tuned to the most?

KROQ!!!

To my east coast friends....

I hope you all made it through OK!  I have been thinking about you all weekend!!

On the road again

I'm in Houston again and it was 109f when I get in my car Sunday afternoon. Because my computer was having trouble I couldn't get to the Internet to play so I was in bed by 11:30 and asleep by midnight. Seven and a half hours later, almost 2 nights worth of sleep, I got up and went for a 3 mile run, ate a large bowl of fruit from the concierge lounge, and made it to work on time.

But, I had a dream as I slept.

I was in a large open field, I knew I was supposed to be there but I had no recollection of how I got there. The house I was supposed to visit was a derelict mess with nothing but rot and stench.  I left quickly and remembered that my daughter was to be running in a track meet nearby, but not knowing where I was, I cold only hear the crowd, but had no sense of direction at to were  the sounds were coming from.

Finally I found a house that appeared livable and I knocked on the door.  I was invited in by a beautiful 20-something blond and their house was beautiful on the inside.  As I walked back in to the house, I saw Carol's son sitting on the toilet in some distress.  He didn't see me. I asked the blond where Carol was (I've had, and still have, the hots for Carol in real life.).  She said that she didn't know so I reached my hand behind her neck, pulled her in hard for a deep kiss, and then reached between her legs.  She was wearing soft terry-cloth like shorts and through them I could feel her soft spot.  So tender and inviting.  She gasped in my mouth as I began to rub in gentle circles, pressing in through the soft spot. 

As her orgasm approached (it was a dream after all), I kept whispering in her ear, "I'm going to fuck your boyfriend's mother next."  It was twisted and a little edgy, and she came on my hand as I woke up.

Ah, dreams...

Now I'm in three days of audit meetings, from heaven to hell all in waking up.  :-)

Have a wonderful Monday!

Sunday Sacrilege - Mind reader...

This guy freakin' read my mind.  He hits on so many of the points I've been thinking about.  But then he questions why Satan would punish you for doing bad stuff and I was laughing loud enough to have to get up and close my door.  It's a perfect clip. 

Son of a Butch commented on my SS (Sunday Sacrilege - not the nasty arm of the Nazi party, BTW) post last week, and then he put up a post of this guy on his blog, and now I'm stealing it back and putting it up as my post.  It's a vicious little circle, I know, but DAMN this guy is funny and spot on.

More bad porn for a Saturday.

OK, I'm not even going to waste your time by imbedding the videos this week... well, OK, I will just because the first 5 min of the video shows off the worst in porn.  Not the worst as in degrading women, cheapening sexual intimacy, or adding to the problem of a severe silicone shortage, no.  I mean worst as in it's boring, and it's boring because they are trying so hard to shoot "PORN."

First, the music is awful.  I know you aren't going to get John Williams to score "Cockfest 42, the year of the midget" but come on people, can we get some music that didn't pop out of a drum machine and some downloaded loops from a freebie website.

Second, the woman is ugly, and not in a good way.  The first four minutes are like the photo-shoot from Porn 101, too much camera movement, low angle shots to accentuate her enormous fake boobs, the pouty smile, the spread legs, even the water bottle pour was horribly executed and even if done well, would have been a bad idea.  And, she can't move, she can't dance, and she can't even walk wall.  Do porn directors just say "Action" and walk off to get their STD medication?    Don't they watch their own content?  I won't even bother mentioning the horrid plastic surgery and the worst lips in the business.  In her defense, she has on really sexy shoes and has refreshing lack of tatoos, one small on on her ankle is all I saw, so that's nice.  Her orgasm at 11:00 might have been real, and they have a nice moment when he throws her back on the couch.

But why all the spitting?  Did Astroglide go off the market?  And one more positive, the requisite anal starts at 15:00 and the last 8 minutes or so are pretty good as she actually seems to be enjoying it, but then then ruin it with another bad money shot what would, in my opinion as a guy, take a distant, distant second place to letting myself explode inside her in time with her last orgasm.  But, I know, they don't call it the "money shot" for nothing.



Hot blonde nailed on the couch brought to you by RedTube - Home of free porn videos



This one gets the "Bad Soundtrack of the year" award for putting the wrong soundtrack, or the wrong section of the sound track on the first 90 seconds and non on the last 90 seconds.  Kudos to the quality control guys on this one...



Hottie Gitta alone in the riding stable brought to you by RedTube - Home of free porn videos

And one last one. I admit that I don't understand the attraction of foot fetish videos. With a woman as pretty as this, why on earth would you want to look at her feet the whole time. It's like going to a strip club for the food. And is that a shadow under her left breast of the worlds biggest boob-job scar. I hope she got compensated for that in the malpractice suit.


Sasha's feet and cunt for you brought to you by RedTube - Home of free porn videos

FFF - Click Click Click

80-110 words
the perfect angle

She’s a little young for you isn’t she?  

Damn, I know, but I think she’s in to me.

So what?  You think every girl in this bar is into you.  They think dating you is the perfect angle to fame and fortune.  Wipe that smile off your face, here she comes.  Besides, you are blitzed, you probably can’t get it up.

Oh, with her, I’ll get it up.

You won’t even remember it.

Oh, I’ll remember it all right.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been an exhausting night, the polls had closed, the results took forever to count, but it was done.  Hands clasped his again and again. “Congratulations Senator” was ringing through his head all night long.

He hung up with his wife back home and heard a sound.

“Kari, you shouldn’t be here.”

“I wanted to congratulate you Senator.”  Her bare legs opened, and beckoned.

“Go! please!”  His heart shook but his knees collapsed and he devoured her wet, pink flesh.  His head swam as he fed his need.  In the distance he heard the shutter click, she had the perfect angle on his career, but he no longer cared.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I saw this picture I knew one thing, he had no idea what was going on and he was screwed.  The first one is more hopeful, at least for him.  If he's supplying the camera it's all different.  In the second one, the one that jumped out at my right away, he's a dead man walking, the modern politician who uses Twitter and Facebook to get elected, but forget about the same when when their pants drop.

I won't say anything until I see her actually post something, but a friend of mine has posted her first FFF, so go out and check our Panser's web-site to see who else is playing.   She gave me a preview, and it was great fun. 

Horribly Nasty Thoughts.....

We were talking about my day and I said the following…

Woke up hard this morning, felt wonderful. Taught my class, discreetly watched the new girl and thought horribly nasty thoughts about her.

She replied,

"Horribly nasty thoughts" *grin* what were you wanting to do to the poor girl??  Please share.

So I did.  (This was written in about 10 minutes, please forgive the typos)

Horribly Nasty Thoughts.....

I walk over to her as the class works up a sweat and the music pounds.  She is in her late 20's, still firm and fit, slim with beautiful breasts wrapped in a low-cut white tank top and black Lycra shorts.  I'm yelling out instructions, speeds and hills but I stop in front of her bike and openly stare at her.  "Don't Stop!" I call out as the music intensifies.  Without hesitation or apology I reach inside her top and pull her tit from her bra and begin tugging roughly on her nipple.  She gasps and begins to pull back but I grip tighter and she complies and sits back on the saddle. 

I reach up with my free hand and pull the straps of her tank down without missing a single instruction to the class.  The riders around her are aghast at my actions but I freeze them in place with a stare.  Their feet circle and press as they watch me strip the young blonde's top off her shoulders in the middle of class.  Some, embarrassed, look away, but I see them watching us in the mirror.

With her top bunched up around her waist, I continue to fondle and caress her without hesitation.  They are full and firm and her nipples are hardening under my rough fingers.  She tries to hides her eyes but I reach into her hair and pull her head up, forcing her to keep her chest open for all to see.  I lean in and whisper in her ear that if she stops the punishments just get worse.  Slap, slap, the firm flesh turns pink as I smack them back and forth.  Her mouth opens to scream but my fingers clog her throat and she sucks on them voraciously. 

Two rows back, I see that the angry brunette has stopped cycling and is caressing her nipples through her thin t-shirt.  We make eye contact and she begins working again, but I know I have my next already lined up.

I lean in and bite her nipple hard, but instead of protesting her hands come to the back of my head and pull me in tighter, asking me to suckle at her teat and pull and ravage.  I stand tall and kiss her deeply and take a handful of hair and pull her off her bike.  The music continues to pulse but most of the class has stopped now as they watch this poor young girl get lost in her own arousal.  She's stopped fighting and kneels on the floor of her own accord. 

"I didn't say stop!" my voice fills the room and most comply, but some are watching, most are touching.  Two older women try to leave but the Japanese mistress, always far right, front row. blocks their escape and tell them that no one leaves until teacher is finished with his student.  They return to their bikes, but hide their eyes and turn up their iPods.  A heavy techno beat echoes off the walls as my subject claws eagerly at the hard shaft hidden by a thin sheen of fabric.  I pull her face to my cock and she bites and licks at the sweaty spandex.  "You may" is what I tell her and she reaches up and pulls my shorts down revealing my iron hard cock. 

She engulfs me in one breath and I feel my head against the back of her throat.  I laugh out loud and begin to fuck her throat while the others watch.  Angry brunette orgasms in the back of the class under her own touch and the short black guy follows suit moments later.  As I pound at the back of her mouth, I look up at the others and bellow at them to keep going.  I look around me until I see the other blond, Russian I think, too thin, looks slightly dazed all the time and I wonder what "medications" she is on that keeps her energy so high but her gaze so unfocused.  "Come here" I shout and she jumps off her bike and joins us. 

She kisses me violently as my cock gets serviced below.  I reach up inside her shirt and feel her nipples, hard, ready, her breasts small and tight against her emaciated chest.  My hands move downward and slip inside her yoga pants and directly into her steaming cunt.  Two fingers immediately slide in and I lift her off the floor until she is on tip-toes alone.  She is mine from the first moment and her orgasm crashes through her small frame, knocking her knees out from under her and she falls back against the railing between rows of bikes. 

I pull my oral slut up from her knees and turn her to face the Russian, now resting against the railing.  "Hands on the rails" I whisper in my slut's ears and she bends forward allowing the Russian to fondle and caress them as the two women kiss. 

"Pull them down for me." my blond reaches for her hips, but I stop her and look over at the young stud who has been eyeing her since the start of class.  His cock is hard inside his shorts and I tell him, "You!  Boner boy, get over her and strip this slut."

He eagerly jumps from his bike and runs over.  He peals her shorts over her perfect hips exposing a well-curved ass and I can see her pussy lips are red and swollen.  Boner-boy begins to pull down his shorts until I push him out of the way and laugh at him.  "She's mine boy" and I slide my cock in with one powerful stroke, grabbing and pulling at her hair to get leverage, "or hadn't you noticed."   He slinks back to his bike as I slide in and out of her wet and eager cunt.  The two women kiss without noticing that the entire class is watching now.  My cock shines in the bright lights of the spin room and three bodies move in perfect synchronization. 

Russian reaches between her legs and draws a dollop of moisture and feeds it to me as the blond begs for a taste of her own.  The Russian complies and feed her nectar as if to a starving baby bird.  I can feel the blond is reaching her peak, the intensity of the public scene and her first taste of pussy is exhausting her and overwhelming her senses.  I look at the Russian and nod my head as I grip the blond by the shoulders.  Russian reaches deep and begins to grind the other woman's clit deep up into her cunt as my cock pistons into places she has never felt.  She gasps and begins to lose control of her breathing. 

More and more we abuse the willing flesh until at last her orgasm explodes behind her eyes, between her legs, in every fiber of her clit and cunt.  "Seizure" doesn’t even come close to describing what her body does in reaction to the pleasure, the pleasure of being taken, of being fucked as 40 others watch, of seeing herself on her knees begging to suck cock of a man she's never met, the taste of sweet female cunt on her tongue and the soft skin of a woman's breast in her hand.

I empty myself fully into her.  Often tested and totally snipped, I don't hold back, I don't pull out; I fill her quivering cunt with every drop of my seed.  She cries out and then just cries as indescribable pleasure destroys her very perception.  She collapses to the floor and the angry brunette steps down, pushing others out of the way, to care for her.  Russian drops to her knees and takes me in her mouth and cleans me completely, tasting both of us on her tongue, she looks up and wordlessly asks permission.  I nod my head and she slips a hand between her thighs and quickly makes herself cum as she sucks the last drops of essence from my cock. 

The room is silent.  The music mix ended long ago.  Another quiet orgasm overwhelms a female voice and a soft "oh fuck" is heard from behind me. 

"Class dismissed" releases them from the spell and the room empties except for me and the three women.  Russian and the brunette help her to dress for the walk to the showers.  As they prepare to leave, the blond leans in and kisses me on the cheek. 

"Thank you Sir." 

The room is empty now and I cover up and shut down the stereo, turn off the lights, and leave. 

TMI Tuesday - Random thoughts

1. When you go to a party, would you rather show up accidentally underdressed or overdressed?

I’m the one who is dressed just a bit off, as if I had just run from a clothes sale and wasn’t sure what goes with what.  I do look nice in a suit, but if I can dress down, I will.

2. What is something you have won and how did you win it? (Inspired by the An Optimistic Virgin)

I won a piano competition in high school, crushing the wanna-bes from the 8 year old division.  I won a race in cross country when I ran Junior Varsity, I won two free airline tickets in a raffle and used them to go to New York, and I won the heart of a beautiful woman in college, and then I left.  I said I won, not that I was smart.

3. Do you squeeze the toothpaste from the middle, end, or top?

With plastic tubes it doesn’t matter any more, just put the freakin’ cap back on.

4. What is something your parents used to say to you that you promised yourself you would never say--but now you catch yourself saying frequently?

It’s not so much what my dad would say, but dang it if I’m not starting to act like him.  I find myself making the same hand gesture when I didn’t hear you, (pointer finger, left hand, bending the ear out, and saying, “Excuse me”), or crossing my legs in conversation, leaning in, and doing the karate chop motion do make a point.  When I feel myself do this, I shudder visibly and have to start over.

5. What 3 lies did you regularly tell your parents? If applicable, what 3 lies do you tell your parents now?

Growing up?

1 – No mom, I don’t masturbate.

2 – I promise, I didn’t eat it.

3 – I’ll be home by 10!!.

Now?

1 – Yea, I’ll call Tom (my brother) tomorrow

2 – Yes, I’m looking in to a mutual fund. (I have no idea how to pick one)

3 – Oh sure, jobs going well, I love it. (I hate it, but he’s big in to stability)

6. What is something that you intended to do today but didn't? Why not? Will you do it tomorrow?

Ohh, that’s easy, I have a bunch of audit documentation I didn’t get to at all.  It’s due on Thursday, but I’m supposed to be on vacation that day.  But I did get caught up on my blog reading.

7. What is something that people do in traffic that really bothers you? (inspired by My Quest To Be A Good Girl)

Easy one as well.  I will kill you if you cut in front of me after I’ve waited for the freeway on-ram p and you didn’t.  I will pull out to block you.  I will give up my space in line to keep you from cutting in.  I will burn the house down of the man 2 cars up who lets you in.  Line cutting on the freeway ramp is next to stomping on kittens and cute baby ducks.  Do not do it.

8. Whose autographs have you collected? (You can stop at five, in case you're an autograph hound or celebrity stalker).

I got Chaim Potok to sign my mother’s favorite books for her Christmas present.  He was her favorite author and he spoke at my college.  Other than that, who cares?   

Bonus: Where do you go to find solitude, tranquility or connection to a higher power?

I think these are different things.  

For solitude, I run.  It can be around the block or over the hills, or along the trails, but for me, running is alone time.  I like the sound of my breath, the rhythm of my feet, and the voices in my head leave me along.  

Tranquility has always been the mountains or the beach.  The beach in winter is a favorite of mine.  I also like abandoned mine shafts and empty warehouses.  OK, not the mine shaft, but I like big empty buildings.

Connecting to a higher power can happen at church, usually when I’m teaching or sharing part of the sermon.  It most often happens with music, singing, playing, or just listening.  I was listening to “A Chorus Line” the other day and the words and music of “At the Ballet” makes my cry every time.  It is the only song on that album I can’t get through without tearing up.  Is that a higher power?  I don’t know, but music takes me to the emotions that real life rarely shares.

an assignment for a friend

The assignment was simple, she was to look around her office, daydream a little, and write a fantasy about another woman in the office.  She then read it for me in her beautiful voice.  It was wonderful...

Me + the office + woman

The office is open plan and shared by six people - three men and three women.  I am in one corner - you have previously seen a view of my desk.  The only personal adornment that I have is a calendar I was sent by a printing company which has my name on each page - this month is has my name written in sand.  At the end of the year I intend to frame these small images and hang them in my room at home.  Otherwise, in the office, I am totally business like.

My colleague H whose desk abuts mine is a bubbly, fun woman.  A bit dizzy for my liking, but pretty, dark haired and with great breasts.  I know she has an interest in an experience with a woman, but I am not her type - in her fantasy the woman is a tall, skinny, large breasted blond wearing lingerie and a face full of make-up.  I only score on one of those counts

Everyone else had left the office for the day but we were still working away on some paperwork that needed to be filed on line that night - she was working on the financial stuff and me on my bits.  From time to time we looked up and talked, she suggested a break so we walked to the kitchen to make ourselves a drink.  The conversation turned to our shared but different fantasies of an encounter with another woman.  Leaning against the kitchen units our hands touched, a bolt of electricity passed between us.  At that moment I knew, we knew, that whilst our visions of the woman might be different from the woman who was there at that moment that this would be the day we would feel the hand of another woman on our bodies.

 

We turned and reached for each other and a gentle, tentative kiss followed.  Soft lips, a soft feminine mouth which was so different from the kiss of a man.  No less passionate but very different.  My hand fell to her breast stroking over her white t shirt.  I could feel her aroused nipple beneath the material.  I wanted to touch her skin, taste her; slowly and waiting for her to stop me if she was uncomfortable, I slid my hand under her shirt and over the lace of her bra.  My fingers curling back the lace to reveal her dark and firm nipple.  Taller than me my head barely needs to drop to take that nipple into my mouth.  I sucked and licked hard and she groaned in pleasure.  Encouraged I used my free hand to tease and play with her other nipple.  Both were hard and as I glanced upward I could see that whatever I was doing was working for her.

Taking her lead from me her hands grab at my breasts and she rapidly undid the buttons of my shirt revealing the lace of my bra without waiting she slipped her hands round my back and undid my bra allowing it to fall from me exposing my breasts for her attention.  I stopped suckling her and allowed her to return the favour.  Her mouth felt so good, my nipples hard in her mouth, shivers of pleasure rippling through me.

We decided the kitchen was too cold and too small and made our way back up to the main office.  Almost running up the stairs and giggling at what we were doing we made it to the main office, almost immediately we started to divest ourselves of our clothes.  Naked we laid on the floor, her legs parted as she lay I traced a line down her body from her neck, around her breasts over her belly, through the thin covering of pubic hair and finally parting her full lips.  She was wet, aroused more than I anticipated.  I raised a finger to my mouth and tasted her.  Her eyes shut in pleasure.  I lower my head and run my tongue up and down between her lips, the moisture increased.  As I lapped at her I could sense that, amazingly to me, she was close to orgasm.  

 

Spurred on, I licked, lapped, nibbled and sucked.  Her body tensed, backed arched a low almost whine from her mouth as she gave in to the moment.  Her pulsing cunt filled my mouth with her cum, it was almost like swallowing a man such was the quantity of her juice.  Kneeling back my wet face glistening, I smiled at her.  Her eyes were sparkling as she caught her breath, sitting she caught my face in both hands and pulled me to her kissing me long and deep, tasting herself on me.  "My turn/your turn" she whispered and lay back.  I shuffled along on my knees until my clit was lined up perfectly with her mouth.  She licked like an expert, like she had done this a million times before. I was turned on already but within just a few probes with her tongue I was ready to cum. A tightening in my throat as I tried to tell her but it was too late and a guttural sound came as I came.  I struggled to maintain my balance as wave after wave of sensation started in my cunt and spread to all extremities.

SS

I'm pretty sure on this one....

Just a couple of thoughts on hell...

If God is just, and I know is a big assumption, then sins must be affixed to a specific punishment, (Penance Units).  Stealing a gum ball, 3 PUs, destroying Enron, 2,000,000 PUs, cheating on your wife, 30,000 PUs, writing a bad sex blog, 19 PUs, etc.  Each misdeed is only so bad,  and not any worse.  Killing a man, cheating on your college entrance exams, running a red light, cussing at the TV, eating grapes in the grocery store, are all different.  Each must be assigned their on PU value.

OK, to the bible tells us to repent, make restitution, do penance, beat ourselves with 50 stripes, offer a mitzvah, a sacrifice, or a broken heart.  If we do that while alive, we are forgiven.  Right?  But what if we don't?

Asking friends of various faiths gains me various answers, but must of them are like this, "You go to hell."  What is hell?  That might be a different post, but for many of us it could be staying right where we are, or it's the hellfire and brimstone or separation from "the divine" or maybe it's New Jersey (or Houston), who knows? 

So God sends us to hell to punish us.  My Christian background tells me that I just suffer as Christ suffered. But He suffered for all mankind, I just need to suffer for me.  Right?  I'm just one guy, with a specific number of sins and their associated Penance Units.  So maybe in my life I've built up a debt of 1,253,322 PUs.  That is a finite number.  I've only sinned so much.  Assuming the "just God" theory, I should only be punished for 1,253,322 PUs, no more, and no less.

So how can you tell me I'm going to hell forever?  At some point I've paid my debt, I've cleared my PUs, I'm done.  What then?  Do I just become a heavenly harp-playing cloud monkey?  Do I cease to exist?  Do I become like God? Do I start all over (oh fuck no)? Do I get my 70 virgins and a mule?  Believe me, 70 virgins may be heaven to me, but is it hell for them?  That's their penance, an eternity stuck with me?  They must have been pretty awful people for that punishment.

But back to the point, after I've done my penance, then what?  I know this isn't the "normal" kind of post for this blog, and I don't expect any answers and I certainly don't want any arguing, ,but it is Sunday morning, and this is is my Sunday Sacrilege, so I get to ask what ever I want, right? 

We will back to our regular scheduled programming tomorrow.

dresses....

I was walking along the street, passing my favorite window, when I thought of you. I always think of you when I pass by here. I think the styles would fit you well, I'd like to peel them off as we walk to the car, after the party, I want to see you in them, trying them on for me.

I want to dress you.

FFF - 2 women

99 words
curl  of.......

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Is the call still going in there?

Yea, I guess, she blew smoke into the heavy air,
I still hear voices

Resting her elbows on the table she felt

uncomfortable in her unused nakedness,
“What’s taking so them so long?”

I don’t know darlin’,
more smoke filled the room.

Can I get dressed?  Her fingers absently-
mindedly ran through the short curl
of hair between her thighs.

Better not, we need to be ready.

Ready for auditors?

You’d be surprised sweetie, you had better be ready….

The muffled tones behind the door stopped.

You’d better be ready….

Do you want to talk about it?

No.

I don’t want you….

Stop!  I said I don’t want to talk about it.

They sat quietly

The noise of the city accentuated the silence of the room.  

She hung her head, still aroused, still hungry, she felt the curl of silk press her needy lips.

I’ve never… tears formed, ran, and freckled the old table.

But you are with me, it’s OK.

What if my boyfriend finds out?

It won’t happen again

How do you know? Fear filled her voice.

Don’t feel bad, it was cute, everyone farts during sex…

She inhaled deeply. She wanted to quit, but each drag filled her with fire and quelled the cravings and she knew she never would.  The sun baked their room and the open windows did nothing in the stagnant summer.  The party music sent pulsing need into her sensitized lips. She looked at the girl, fixating on the curl of faint scar tissue around her nipples, jealous of her youth.

Are you ready to go back in?

Yea, boys for you, girls for me this time?

Yes, she felt the cravings and wanted the fire.  

Another thing she’d never quit.

This picture, found on a tumblr, unfortunately forgotten, struck me immediately with so many possibilities.  Where they waiting? Were they done? Angry? Sad, in love, breaking up?  How many times have we all sat at that table, one party aloof, distant, waiting for the sad one to speak, to plead their case to make an apology, to beg forgiveness, or express regret.  

Their state of undress both limits and expands the creative possibilities?  Or maybe it’s the apparent difference in age and implied experience.  Are they a couple, or rivals, or just working girls on a break?  My original ending for #3 had them walking in to the party hand-in-hand with the tagline, “Thanks Mom, I really need the money,” or something like that, but I couldn’t get it set-up right without it sounding tacked on, too much of a surprise ending, to I let it stay on the darker side.

Above all else, to me, this is a quiet picture, stifling heat, glaring sun, no ice water in sight; this is oppressive in mood and moment.

If you care about specific “inspirations”

#1 – Written during my morning conference call with, you guessed it, the auditors.  Buttoned down by day, horny and old by night.

#2 – What are we ashamed of?  Our first lesbian encounter, her first john? What was it?  Well, I couldn’t let it be too serious.

#3 – Addictions, we all have them, so this is hers.  Past her prime, helping out the new girl, both tired, but needing something.  We all crave the fire, don’t we?

Thanks to Panser for using my idea, that’s always fun, and thank, as always, for his efforts in brining us all together.  Now go check out everyone else, and next week, I want to see YOUR name on the list.

Advizor

Old Jews Telling Jokes.

I found this over on Son of a Butch and it made me laugh, so I had to share.

We play different roles....

Friend
Neighbor
Boss
Worker
Choir Boy
Employee
Dad
Mom
Sister
Brother
Comedien
Counselor

We all play different roles, we wear different hats and flex from one to another.  But then there are times when we take on darker hues and speak in a different voice.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She arrived home and e-mailed me, asking permission to cum before bed.  
A simple request that I am usually quick to approve.  It was 5 minutes until a knock on the door would begin a meeting.

Me:     I wish I could be there to guide and direct.

her:     I wish you could be here

Me:     I would walk in to your room and without a word, press your knees back to your chest, press your bullet deep into your ass, and begin fucking you relentlessly.

I would not stop.

more more more more

her:     and I would moan and groan with delight

Me:     deep and hard.

OH FUCK!!!

her:     fill your ears with my words

Me:     I can see your cunt splitting open for me

dripping wet

aching

tight on my cock

her:     and your name

I am open and wet for you

Me:     fucking you like a whore, no smile, no conversation

just cock and pussy and fucking.

her:     gripping your cock

hard

milking it with my cunt

no conversation needed for that kind of fucking

animalistic

urgent

Me:     until you explode around my shaft and I pin you to the bed by the neck with my strong hand.

her:     almost violent

and definitely explosive

Me:     past almost

past urgent

past fucking

past passion

her:     yes, yes, yes

I want that

that total desire

beyond reason

Me:     I do not want sex, I do not want love, I want FUCKING.

I want anger returned in pussy form

I want the danger of losing control

her:     all of my anger centered in my core

Me:     I want fear in your eyes and cum in your cunt.

her:     and directed to you

Me:     slapping

thrusting

pinching

biting

ripping

tearing flesh and soul asunder.

FUCK ME!!!!!

her:     I WANT YOU

TO TAKE ME

FUCK ME

Control Me

Me:     cum for me whore

her:     Make me yours

Me:     cum over your hand

your fist

your tongue

your tits

her:     Gigi is working hard for me

pressing on my clit

Me:     FUCK GIGI!!!!

her:     I can't fuck Gigi; I am full of the dildo, full of your cock

I close the door to ensure privacy in my last two minutes before the meeting begins

Me:     you will cum for me within seconds of answering my call.

but not a second sooner.

are you ready?

are you????

her:     nearly

I cannot speak

there are too many children around

Me:     do not say a word

my meeting starts in 2 min

ARE YOU READY?

The video connection is made and her face appears, but she is wasting precious moments typing

her:     ready

you want to just watch

and me not see you?

Why this discussion when I can almost hear footsteps outside my door?

Me:     now!

I have 1 minute

you said you were ready

seconds only now.

CUM WHORE>>>> CUM!!!!

Her voice tightens and her breathing stops, lungs clamped shut by body spasms that overwhelm her.  Her mouth opens and the most wonderful, guttural, gasping sounds make their escape.

YES

very well done

you are allowed 2 additional.

her:     in time, just in time

Me:     I must go.

her:     two additional! You are a kind Master

thank you

There is a knock at the door and my meeting begins.

Am I? Really? Probably...

I had a chance to chat with a friend of mine today.  I don't get to see her as often as I'd like.  Trouble at home pushes her Internet time to school computers only and, well, they discourage undressing while chatting, so our talks are pretty tame.  Which is fine, I love talking to her, and she has this cute voice and a great smile, and well, terrific hair. 

Anyway, we were chatting along and she had to go to talk to her "really special someone" who is getting all of her time (damn him), so we had to say good-bye.  I told her it was nice to see her and that I wished we had time to talk when she had more privacy since she's on a set of headphones and everyone can hear what she says.

She smile and laughed.  "You are such a man whore." she said, and I busted out laughing.  "You talk to so many women."  I couldn't catch my breath I was laughing so hard. 

"There aren't that many!" I countered, but she added, "I like that about you..."

We wrapped up, I complimented her on her cute blouse, blew her a kiss, sent her on her way, and hung up.

A man whore?  Maybe she called me a man-slut, I can't remember exactly, but the sentiment was the same, and I don't think she meant it in a mean way, but I've been thinking about it every since.

What, or how many, makes me a slut?  I know its the same question women have been facing since sex was invented.  How many partners does it take to earn the title of slut? Am I considered one just because I live my on-line life out in the open (see tomorrow's post), or because I'm willing to talk about Friend A with Friend B, and she tells Friend C? 

One of my friends in college told me that she had, by her sophomore year, slept with 10 guys.  That struck me as odd because I though of her as a pretty "good" girl.  She said that the secret to not being called a slut is to date guys with class who don't spread rumors, and, more importantly she said, don't go around starting the rumors yourself.  She was discreet, friendly, but discreet in her relationships and few people would have guess her "number."

So, am I a slut? a player? friendly? a man-whore, a flirt? 

and, if the answer is "YES" in your eyes, does it matter? Is that a bad thing?  Does it impact my female friends to know that I flirt and talk and play with others on-line?  Does it take out the fun?  There were girls in my high school who would sleep most any guy that could walk upright and buy them dinner.  Apparently they, especially one of them, were very good in bed, but her ex-boyfriend said that the lack of a "challenge" took the fun out of it.  Since it was easy to have sex with her, he didn't see it as exciting.

So what now?  Do I have to stop talking about it?  stop doing it?  Stop enjoying my time with my friends?

Do you think I'm a slut?



On a side note, one of my favorite bloggers posted this just hours after mine went up.  I'm sure it's pure coincidence, but anyway....CLICK HERE

are you waiting for me?

Are you waiting for me as I requested, mirrors in position?

SS - Prayer to the Faithful

I know this has been making the rounds, but it's still funny and I need something light and airy today.

Have a wonderful Sunday!!! And remember, Monday is just one day away.

Porn for a Saturday - 2 reviews and a few complaints

I shouldn't give bad porn like this any more publicity than it already gets, but I've rarely seen a clip with actors less interested in what they are doing.  Didn't anyone notice? 

1. They look way too be young to doing anything like this at all.
2. They are the WORST kissers ever, even for porn kissing.  Watch the first 50 seconds and I'll pay you to find kissing less attractive.
3. At 4;40 she shakes her head as he's starting to go down on her and the boredom just pours out.
4. You can almost hear the director telling them what to do (touch leg, lick, touch breast, shake hair)
5. It looks like she's chewing gum.
6. If she is at all turned on by the first 6 minutes of the clip, you can't see it at all, maybe she's a good actress after all and the director told her to "look bored, not quite dead, but close." 
7. at 7:44 the worlds most disinterested blowjob ever starts.  My wife does better than that.
8. It just gets worse, the fake moaning is obvious, and they just look so uncomfortable.
9. Oh shit!  I think he's chewing gum too
10. At some point the director should have stopped everything and sent them home to figure out what sex is supposed to feel like.  
11. OK, and here is something I don't get.  At 18:44 he pulls and and starts jerking off.  I know it's for the money shot, but look at how bored she is just waiting there, waiting, waiting, waiting.  Are the male performers on so many "delay" drugs or creams that it takes them 5 minutes of furious jacking to cum on a beautiful woman?  She's cute enough to move things along much faster.  Somethings going on here.
12. At 23:11 (believe me, I fast forwarded through most of this trype), right in the middle of the cum shot, right as he's is having an orgasm on her chest, she looks over at the camera with that look that just screams, "Can I go have some ice cream now?"

Teenage couple fucking in the woods brought to you by RedTube - Home of free porn videos


OK, to redeem myself a little, here is a clip that is better, still not great, but it reflects some of my pet peeves with even decent porn.

1. First, the good.  The first three minutes of this video are actually funny.  The guys are dorky, they don't try to do much, but she's a doll, has a fantastic accent, a wonderful look, and it's just cute.  Grocery boys?  Right.
2. More good stuff.  As they sit on the couch, the blonde an d the brunette talk and they pull out an old device, the "I've never kissed a girl."  This isn't new, but we don't expect "new" in porn, just plausible is enough.  The whole interaction, the first kiss, the pull away, it's all great.  For pornstars they pull off this little scene and i'm entertained as well as aroused.  All good so far....
3. But then....  After the cute and very effective set-up, they start fucking like, well, like porn stars. The arousal of this piece should be the 1st timer nerves, the "what do I do next?" moments?  Instead they waste a great beginning and suddenly is boring porn all over again.
4. However, as they undress the blond, nice and slow, its good.  The teasing reveal is better than...
5. Then, after some fast forwarding and skipping ahead, we get to my next LEAST favorite thing about porn, the bad transition.  The brunette, after performing some nice oral on the blond, is fully dressed.  One cut jump later she's bare-assed naked with a tongue in her slit.  WTF?  That's no fun.  Give me some tranistion, show her getting undressed, draw it out a bit.  Geeezzz..
6. In summary, the little flashes of creativity are wasted when the director can't see past the obvious content and give us a little more.  THis tells me that they cute parts are just a fluke.

Sex with her boyfriend's sister brought to you by RedTube - Home of free porn videos

FFF - Are you ready for some football!!!

50-90
driving deep

GO! GO! GO!

Her lover’s thrusting increased in power as the fullback crossed the 40, 30, 20 yard line.  She stared at the Star Wars comforter and enjoyed the building sensation, so close, so very close.

Unseen by the celebrating runner, the corner-back came from behind and leveled the runner with a crushing tackle.  

NOOOOOOO!  She felt him pull back, ranting at the screen, leaving her empty.

The announcer’s voice cut through, “The Ravens have been driving deep but have yet to score.  How disappointing.”

“You’re telling me…” she added.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Are you in?

I’m trying, fuck, give me a break

What’s wrong?

It’s not working, you’re too tall

What?

Hell, I don’t know, I’m sinking in to the bed.  Get lower.

I can’t, I have to keep my foot up like this.

Why?

The book says, “The maid is brought to climax by her stalwart knight, driving deep with passion.

What?

Look, it’s right here, “The Kneeling Maid”

Can’t we just fuck?

No, I want to do it right, and this picture is so pretty.

I hate that fucking book.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I try not to pick my story lines the first time I see the weekly FFF picture, I usually let it settle, let thoughts come and go, and then, usually in a rush Thursday afternoon, start writing.  This week was the exception.  Right off the bat I thought football, American football.  I imagined a young guy, probably still in college, still more concerned about the score, than scoring, without the least bit of consideration for her.  Typical college kid. 

But then I thought again and say a young couple, not too experienced, him hard and young and eager and ready, her, still caught up in romance novels and bodice ripper fantasies where sex is done "right" and where it's all pretty and maids and knights "make love" and "fucking" is for the course underclass. 

This picture also reminded me of the thought that "Good porn makes for bad sex."  Maybe he saw something he liked and was recreating it, or she thought he'd like it so she took the position of his latest on-line obsession.  I don't know, but it seems like they are uncomfortable, contrived, not enjoying the sex but trying to make a show of it.  That never turns out well.

As usual, I'd like to thank the Academy for this award.... oops, wrong notes...

Thanks to The Panserbjørne for putting this all together, and an invitation to everyone to join in.  It's a lot of fun, and I promise we'll be nice to you in comments. 

Manicure

My call ended and I pulled out the kit from the bottom right drawer and laid out in the tools. Clippers, cuticle stick, cuticle cutter, and a metal emery board for cleaning under the nails were cradled in the inexpensive travel kit.  My buffing block, another (better) emery board, mineral oil, and lotion sat in the gift box that was never given 2 Christmases ago.  Bought on a whim at the mall kiosk, it sits in my drawer as a reminder of you and as a buffer against the reality that you are gone.

The DVD whirs and hums at the movie begins and i I slip my wedding ring off and place it, with a metallic ring, on the faux-wood surface of my desk.  This is not ritual, but practical, as the lotion at the end dulls the platinum grooves that define and highlight my ring.  Once dry, one ready, the ring will return.  It always does.

My left hand is first, always. The sharp metal tips digs deep beneath the nails to remove and clean.  When I am in the pool, my shoulders pulling long strokes through the water, ,or after in the Jacuzzi, my back against the jets, they come out clean.  Today there was no gym, no water, no bright white tips to show that i am not like him.

The metal gouges deep and strips out the debris of carbon-based life.  Build-ups of dust, oil, flakes from her scalp embedded as long red marks are left behind.  I smile as i recollect what else might be there, what evidence of lust have I collected that is so easily scraped out by a 99-cent kit. 

The emery board drags lightly back and forth, defying those who tell me to go only one way, but they must be joking, To go one way leaves an edge as sharp as a blade, and blades cut tender skin.  I shape and round the tip, paying attention to the corners, smoothing them, making them fit perfectly.

My hands stop moving and settle softly on the desk.  She needs the money yet her guardian refuses her every argument, "But it's mine" she cries as he stands behind her in the darkened, forcing his hand down her shirt by force of authority only.  I stare entranced by the scene, his belt buckle jingles quietly as he spin her chair around and tells her that she will get her money when he trusts her.  With a single move he impales her throat and repeats his viscous mantra, "Can I trust you?"

Heart beating, the scene changes and I snap too and move along. 

The buffer block comes next, blue, grey, white.  Countless circles, strokes, rubbing, softening, smoothing, getting my nail to a high gloss shine.  And then, the right.

More clumsily done with the left hand in charge, I repeat the process 5 times, 20 touches, cleaned, shaped, buffed, buffed, and buffed again.  I run them against my cheek, high on the cheek, on the soft skin, working and reworking until I feel no snag, until I can feel no edges, no points, hooks, or interruptions. 

Two paper towels are laid down, two drop of oil are gently spread to harden and protect each nail.  First the left, and then, holding the small bottle awkwardly. squeezing the first drop out and letting capillary action draw out the next, they shine with thick liquid.  Again focused on the film it plays forwards in Swedish and I read my way through.

5, 6, 7 minutes, now the lotion.  With the oil dry, a generous dollop fills my palms and I moisturize from elbow to fingertip and I work it in, diligently searching for a stray nail, an un-softened curve, a tip too sharp, or and edge, surface, or crack too rough.  I feel a small line on my hand and pick up the clippers to remove the offending hang-nail. More lotion to sooth the cut, fragrant, not too girly, a strong scent. I turn my attention back to the screen, resting the heel of my hand on the spotted paper towel, and wait for it to soak in, settle, and do it's work. 

The phone rings once.  Caller ID tells me all I need to know.  My towels clean off the unabsorbed lotion from my hands and are dropped into the wastebasket.  The cool air of the hallway tingles on my skin as i make my way.  Her assistant greets me with a silent smile and knocks once on the door. 

"Yes" is softly heard, and the door is open.

She is, as agreed on top of her desk, her $300 shoes are still on, but nothing else.

"Are your fingers ready for me?"

"Yes mistress."

"So let's begin....."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I did my nails today while watching "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo".  While my routine isn't retualized, I began to imagine that it was.....