This was dictated on my phone, transcribed by poorly programmed voice recognition software, then very lightly edited, just enough, I hope, to get across the story. And yes, I finished when the story did.
Phone rings
We need to take about the tickets
what are you doing right now?
uh do you want the truthful answer or the politically correct answer
give me the truthful answer
well I'm laying on a blanket in my backyard naked thinking about masturbating
holy shit don't say that,
well you said you wanted the honest answer
ohh not that honest
OK, so you want the politically correct answer?
yeah let's back up and try this again. hi what are you doing? We need to talk about the tickets
Well you can come over. I am currently in the backyard thinking about some of
my friends and hoping that they are satisfied with their daily life
Now, that is a bullshit answer
Well it’s the the politically correct version and that means it's usually
bullshit
That's not what I meant
What you meant was that you really wanted to know what I was doing but you didn’t
want to admit that you wanted to know exactly, what I was doing.
Don't put it that way
Admit it, you're still curious you had your chance and now you think you blew
it
Well, did I?
I'm not sure yet, all I know, is that right now I’m alone in the backyard, no
one can see me, no one knows how I'm doing. I have a tube of lube and a
vibrator next to me.
That's what I mean! You can't say that stuff anymore.
Why not? You used to like hearing it all the time.
I know, but I thought we were being good.
OH, fuck bein good. That didn't get me anywhere now did it?
That's not my fault. I just I just couldn't go through with it.
That's fine, just don't tell me you didn't want to
that's not fair, you know I wanted to, you know I really wanted to do it, but.
But what? Tony banging your best friend when we were on the phone so I don't
think it mattered too much. She's not my best friend anymore.
Good, neither is he. Just tell me the last time you thought about me
Please don't make me tell you that
why not? that recently?
you know what it does to me when we start talking, you know how I get wet.
I know
stop it
I think you're getting wet right
stop it or I'll hang up
ohh you could have hung up minutes ago when I called you, you like texting because it doesn't go
anywhere but once you hear my voice you know I'm gonna ask you questions
Then stop asking me questions
I like hearing you answer them
Come on, that’s just not fair. You know what you do to me.
I know what I want do to you
See it’s stuff like. We’re not supposed
to talk about that stuff with each other
Why not?
well I'm your boss
you're not my boss
I paid for your last project
Correction, you reimbursed me for my last project, all my labor was free along
with my expertise a couple of gallons of paint and several dozen brushes if II
remember
OK fine, that might be true, but what about next day? what about when we see
each other next?
What's the problem?
You'll know things about me
like what?
ohh come off it. you know. You ask questions and I tell you
answers and you know I can't lie to you.
There's no value in lying in this situation I'm not building a fantasy, I’m building
a record
that's what I mean. You ask me these questions and I have to tell you the truth
otherwise it doesn't work, does it?
you're right, it only works when you answer truthfully. I can tell a fantasy
answer when I hear it, just like a fake orgasm or porn. it's beautiful, but
it's a lie so it doesn't mean as much. why do you think you like telling me the truth?
I don't know, maybe because no one else asks me those kinds of questions.
Well? Should we start with some answers right now?
What?
You know what my first three questions are. They are always the same and I
expect you to answer them 100% honestly.
Seriously? I have to go to rehearsal in like 2 hours
That’s not the point
Yeah, it is, because when you get to rehearsal I want you to know that tingling
you feel is because of me
it's always because of you
Then let's get started/ give me the
basic 3 now
fuck you
not yet, answers please
OK let me think
you shouldn't have to think that hard but you know the rule, not lookoing
it's just that sometimes they're just not that exciting
if they're on you, then they're absolutely thrilling
OK, pale blue, high cut, probably Fruit of the Loom and a little bit worn out
good girl
You can’t call me that for just answering the simplest of questions
I can because that's what you are
what do you mean?
you are my good girl. you answer my questions, you tell me the truth, you let
me inside and that makes all the difference
Inside? What do you mean? We've never, you know, never done you know that.
That's the least important place I need to be right now
what do you mean?
you'll let me in there when you're ready to let me in there. Where I wanna be
is inside deep inside your head. I want to be inside your panties when I'm 100
miles away. I want to be in the shower with you while I'm sitting next to my
family at dinner, and I want to be in your bed when you bring somebody home
from the theater
Fuck you
That's why you're my good girl
Thank you Sir. Do you have another question for me?
Yes. When was your last orgasm?
What it's none of your business
tell me tell me now
OK, today's Friday, so it was Tuesday. I just got back from a run. I was so
tired.
how far did you go?
6 miles. I did the big loop around the train station, it's flat and it's fast
kind of like you
cut that out,
You know I think you're beautiful I'm just teasing you
you know I wish my boobs were bigger,
no you don't. they're perfect just the way they are, just the way you are.
what do you mean by that?
They are small, sensitive, and they fit inside my mouth and I can suck on them
so hard
May I touch them Sir? Please?
Be specific
May I touch my breasts Sir?
Yes, you may, but only over your shirt
What?
Just for now. imagine we're in the movie theater. I can't get you naked yet,
but I can touch you, feel your nipples getting hard
ohh Sir, they are so hard right now
pinch one, the left and then the right
Please Sir
I time my touch with the action on the screen so you can yell out as the cars
explode and the men fight for some stupid reason.We picked this one because the
reviewers said it was unnecessarily loud for an hour and a half and that's what
I want you to be, loud
may I?
May I what?
may I take my shirt off please
yes you may tell me how it feels
it’s light blue T-shirt that's one of my oldest it's and it's soft and I like
how it feels against my skin
you may take it off if you tell me what happened next after your run
yes Sir I had the house to myself so I stripped down as soon as I walked inside
the front door. my shoes first then my socks. my T-shirt came off and then my
running bra. I'm still not sure why I wear one, but I like it.
Chafing is a bitch.
come on Sir, you know I don't like that word
I'm sorry my sweet, Chaing is unpleasant.
I took off my shirt and my bra I saw myself in the hallway mirror
go on
The one my grandma likes so much that she bought it at the flea market last
year after grandpa died
Yes, I know that mirror. What did you see?
I saw my red hair, the small curves of my breasts. I saw sweat running down
between and I've watched myself touch my nipples.
And? And what? Tell me
it made me wet, so I reached down and I pulled my pants down and my panties
along with it until I was bare. I stepped out of my running tights I stood
naked in front of the mirror
yes continue
Sir? may I ?
What?
May I touch myself?
Be specific
May I put my hands down my pants and touch my clit?
Yes, you may, but you cannot stop talking
thank you Sir. it feels good
What feels good?
I like touching myself when I talk to you
tell me more. what did you see in the mirror?
well I had just shaved that morning I
was still a little red but my skin was bare I could see my lips, so I used my
fingers and I spread myself open and then put one finger deep inside myself and
that's all it took to cum. Sir, just thinking of you and one finger was all it
took
You came from me in the hallway?
Yes, just you, a long run, and one finger, Sir.
Good girl, very good girl.
